Safer sex
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Important contact details
- Terrence Higgins Trust: HIV & sexual health advice, call 0808 802 1221 (10am-6pm Mon-Fri)
- FPA: Information on contraception, STIs, pregnancy & abortion
- National Sexual Health Helpline call 0300 123 7123
- Ask for ANI: Domestic abuse support
- Ask for Angela: Discreet support for anyone who is feeling vulnerable on a night out
- British Pregnancy Advisory Service (BPAS): 03457 30 40 30 (Mon-Fri 8am-5pm, Sat 8am-4pm, Sun 9.30am-2.30pm)
- Switchboard: LGBTQ+ helpline, call 0300 330 0630 (10am-10pm daily)
- Brook: Sexual health charity for under-25s, find your nearest clinic
- Health for Teens: Sexual health info & advice for teenagers
Understanding STIs
Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) are passed from one person to another through sexual contact, and they’re usually caught through vaginal, anal or oral sex. Some STIs like chlamydia can be treated through antibiotics, but other STIs like herpes have no cure but can be managed.
HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) is a virus that damages the cells in your immune system, damaging your body’s ability to fight everyday infections and diseases. HIV is passed through bodily fluids, so you can get HIV by having unprotected sex with someone who has it. Whilst HIV cannot be cured, some treatments can help most people with HIV to live a long and healthy life, plus reduce the risk of passing it on to someone else.
Anyone can get an STI, and one of the main ways to reduce your chances of getting or passing on an STI is to use a condom for all sexual contact, including oral sex. Other ways to help prevent STIs include:
- You and your partner getting tested before any sexual contact, and having honest communication about both of your sexual history
- Limiting your number of sexual partners at one time
- Avoiding sex when under the influence of drugs or alcohol
- Getting vaccinated against human papillomavirus (HPV), or hepatitis A or hepatitis B if you’re in a high-risk group
STIs are easier to treat the earlier they’re caught, so you should get tested regularly even if using condoms.
Why is it important to get regularly tested for STIs?
STIs can typically be treated or managed if caught early, but if they develop, they can cause long-term health problems. Without treatment, STIs like chlamydia and gonorrhoea can cause infertility, and HIV can become fatal.
Some STIs don’t show up immediately on tests, but if you’re worried about having an STI after unprotected sex you should still get tested as soon as possible. If you think you’ve come into contact with an STI, you shouldn’t have any sex until you have been tested and know you are clear, or if you have gone through the complete STI treatment.
Getting tested regularly for STIs doesn’t just look after your own health, but the health of your partner (or partners) too. Some people may feel worried about getting tested, but the sooner STIs are diagnosed, the sooner they can be treated. Many STIs have no symptoms, so you will only know you have them if you get tested.
There are lots of ways to get tested for STIs. You can go to a GP or sexual health clinic, or you can receive a free at-home STI test from the online sexual health service sh.uk that’s run in partnership with the NHS. Boots Online Doctor Sexual Health Testing Kit Services5 also offer a range of at-home testing kits, including ones for HIV, chlamydia and gonorrhoea.
Why is consent important?
Before you even think about any sexual activity, you need to think about consent.
Consent means that you and your partner have both given permission to any intimate or sexual activity. Even if someone hasn’t explicitly said no, you shouldn’t assume that they have said yes; their body language and behaviour should be obvious that they’re consenting, and coercing someone into consenting isn’t consent. Someone who is under the influence of drugs or alcohol, or is asleep or unconscious cannot consent. You can also change your mind at any point.
All non-consensual contact is illegal. Someone younger than the age of consent (in the UK, this is 16 years of age) automatically cannot consent.
Non-consensual sexual contact can also leave a long-term toll on the victim’s mental health. Charities like Rape Crisis UK have confidential and anonymous helplines if you need someone to talk to. Find out more information on the NHS website.
Understanding contraceptives
Condoms are the only contraceptive that helps reduce the risk of STIs and falling pregnant. There is a wide range of contraceptives that you and your partner can use to help prevent pregnancy, but you should continue to use a condom if you have a new partner, more than one partner or casual partners.
There are two types of contraceptives that can prevent someone from getting pregnant: hormonal and non-hormonal.
Hormonal contraceptives
- Contraceptive pill, also known as the pill
- Contraceptive implant
- Contraceptive patch
- An intrauterine system, also known as the hormonal coil or IUS
- Vaginal ring
Non-hormonal
- Intrauterine device (IUD), also known as the coil or copper coil
- The diaphragm, also known as a cap
When you’re using a new contraceptive, make sure to read the instructions and use them as prescribed for the best effectiveness. You should also speak to your partner about what contraception to use before engaging in any sexual contact if you want to avoid pregnancy.
Find out more about hormonal and non-hormonal contraceptives.
Sometimes, these contraceptives fail or you have unprotected sex. To help prevent pregnancy, you can visit your local GP, pharmacy or sexual health clinic to get emergency contraception. You can also access the morning-after pill through our Boots Online Doctor Morning After Pill Service2 or in-store at your local Boots pharmacy, alongside going to a GP or sexual health clinic.
Emergency contraceptives do not protect against STIs including HIV; if you’ve had unprotected sex, it’s best to get tested for any STIs.
Condoms are the only contraceptive that helps prevent both pregnancy and STIs. If used correctly, condoms are 98% effective, but there are a number of factors that can reduce this:
- Condoms can break if they come into contact with oil-based lubricants, so opt for a water-based lubricant instead
- They can also break because of certain vaginal medications, so make sure to read the patient information leaflet or speak to your pharmacist to check. Condoms can also be broken by sharp fingernails, teeth or jewellery
- Condoms can break if they’re too small; they can also slip off if they’re too big
- They also have expiration dates. Condoms expire because the material gets weaker over time, making them more likely to break
- Condoms can also weaken in certain conditions, such as if they’re left in sunlight or a hot place
You need to use a new condom every time, including when changing to vaginal and anal penetration, and from the beginning of penetrative sex to the end. This is because pre-ejaculate fluid can contain sperm and can still pass an STI onto your partner.
You can buy non-latex condoms for people with latex allergies, or internal condoms which are worn inside the vagina – but these are only 95% effective.
Lubricants can help sex feel more comfortable, especially with certain types like anal sex.
Factors like vaginal dryness can mean there’s less natural lubricant, which increases friction and makes it more likely for condoms to break. Using a lubricant will create added moisture, making it less likely for the condom to break. Similarly, the anus doesn’t naturally lubricate, so to reduce the risk of small tears (called fissures) or the condom breaking, lubricant should be used; you can also get lubricants designed for anal sex.
Condoms can break if they come into contact with oil-based lubricants though, so opt for a water-based lubricant.
Related products
Safer sex in the LGBTQ+ community
In recent times, it has been acknowledged that STIs such as HIV are no longer viewed as health concerns linked only to the LGBTQ+ community, however, this does not mean that safer sex isn’t something that should be practiced.
Make sure to use a new condom (external or internal) every single time, including when changing from vaginal to anal penetration. All sexual contact carries the risk of catching and passing on an STI so you might want to use latex gloves, or for oral sex, a condom or dental dam. It’s also really important to get regular STI tests to look after your health and your partner’s.
Transgender or non-binary people that have had lower surgery (the removal of genitals to surgically create a vagina, labia and clitoris or a penis) also need to be careful when having sex to avoid STIs or infections:
- If you’ve recently had lower surgery, unhealed skin could make you more susceptible to getting or passing on an STI. Make sure to talk to your doctor for advice personalised for you.
- Whilst your body recovers from surgery, your anus as well as your genitals may be delicate and could be at risk of tearing and bleeding. You should speak to your doctor to find the right information for you.
Related services
Let’s talk safe sex with Megan Barton Hanson
Our sexual health is a huge part of our lives. In this episode, we’re joined by the model and ex-Love Island star, Megan Barton Hanson who has spoken openly and honestly about her sexuality and sex life, as well as the many benefits that practicing safe sex has had for her.
Sexual health 101
Frequently asked questions
Some people use this to easily understand the basics of safer sex. The four Cs are:
- Consent
- Condoms
- Contraception
- Communication
The withdrawal method, also known as ‘pulling out’, isn’t a recommended contraceptive method by the NHS because it’s so ineffective.
This is because it’s difficult to time at what point the penis should ‘pull out’ from the vagina to ejaculate elsewhere, and the pre-ejaculate fluid from a penis can also include small amounts of sperm.
This method doesn’t protect you or your partner against STIs.
Having sex is usually safe to do whilst pregnant, unless your GP or midwife has said otherwise. And, although your baby cannot tell or feel if you have sex, some STIs can be passed from mother to baby and can affect the health of your baby both during pregnancy and afterwards.
If you or your partner have multiple sexual partners, it’s important that you use a barrier form of contraception like a condom to look after yourself and your baby from STIs.
Avoid having sex with someone if you know or think they have an STI, and if you suspect you or your partner have one, speak to your GP or midwife as soon as possible.
You can get an STI at any point during your menstrual cycle, including your period, so you should still use a condom.
Whilst your body is typically at its least fertile during your period, there’s still a chance of pregnancy. Make sure to use a condom to help reduce the chance of an unplanned pregnancy.
2Access to treatment is subject to an online consultation with a clinician to assess suitability. Subject to availability. Charges apply.
5Access to test kits is subject to an online consultation with a clinician to assess suitability. Subject to availability. Charges apply.
21Available in selected England stores only. Subject to availability. Eligibility criteria apply.
